Merry Criminal Christmas

How can you not enjoy a story that ends like this:

"I d-d-didn't n-n-nknow S-santa Cl-Clause was such-such a s-s-sumbitch."

"Believe it. Into the back seat, Nanook. Let's go put you into a nice warm cell."

My that LawDog has lead a colorful life down there in Texas.