R&D Well Spent

The vending machine at work has devil's food twinkies. What a grand innovation! Kids today live in a wonderful age. Which is probably why they're all so fat.

When I was in school my mother used to buy low-fat low-sugar health twinkies. No I'm not kidding. Such things did exist. They probably still do in some vile Hostess factory outlet somewhere. She did this because while I was badly underweight through my formative years, both my parents were not.

The diet snack cakes were pretty awful. The only thing a twinkie has going for it is the sin content. Sugar! Cream! Together! Woo Hoo! Low-fat and low-suger meant it that the food nazis had sucked out the Twinkie the Kid's fun-loving cowboy soul and left him a mere husk of himself only fit for some dietary form of Certified Public Accountancy.